"If they fire, we'll burn instantly."
Alexander (name changed) from the Chelyabinsk region sent us not a letter, but excerpts from his diary. In them he describes a premonition of war, and after it has begun, a count of who among his acquaintances is for and against, and the subsequent conclusion. The chief's recommendations to speak cautiously piss Alexander off, but then he remembers caution and asks for forgiveness. This is the diary of a man who has chosen to silently disagree with the regime, with sorrowful observations and unkind expectations.
February 22, 2022
Already recognized by the LNR and DNR.
At the celebration of the upcoming February 23, A and B clashed at work. A shouted at B: "It was clear why passports were issued to the LNR and DNR. To go and "defend" them later. B responded, "And why were the people of the LNR and DNR bullied for 8 years?" Someone yelled: "Enough!" We finished our tea in a deadly silence.
February 23, 2022
Weekend . Made two snowmen with my son outside the house. Went for a walk in the stadium. We were watching hockey. My son was playing in a pile of snow.
Here we go...
In the afternoon an acquaintance called me at work and started to tell me if I had heard about how we had hit the Ukrofascists for the LNR and DNR. I couldn't bear to listen to this redneck - I just hung up, saying that I had no time...
In the evening I went to bed in complete peace. If they fire, we'll burn up in a heartbeat. As Vovandemort had blurted out, "We'll go to heaven, and they'll burn in hell.
I asked my young colleagues at work if it was the right thing to do. The young ones said yes, they were right. One said he was ready to go there himself. I asked again - and die? And went out.
Everywhere they talk about some Anglo-Saxons, about "Nazis. Vomit.
Held a men's badminton tournament. Out of 8 participants, two were for the special operation, five were against it, and one was a boy, still a schoolboy (I did not question him). One player: "I would finish this Poo with my own hands..."
There was a stray thought to suspend those two players who are for SWO, but have already started playing. I don't want to communicate with either of them.
While I was at the tournament, the family was talking to relatives in another city. In the course of the conversation my wife realized that both my mother and brother were for this massacre, because they didn't like "those Khokhlovs. I was totally screwed. And then how do I communicate with them?
At home again we discuss everything. My wife can't take it anymore: "That's enough, my blood pressure is high, I can't sleep. What can I do? I shut up. I listen to Echo and Dozhd, Latynina, Bykov, Khodorkovsky, and everyone else.
February 28 (Monday)
At work this morning the head of the department came in and told us to be careful what we say, because we had just been told at a meeting that a woman from another department had had her son prosecuted for anti-war activities - and no information about what he had done. Allegedly he wrote an anti-war rant on his page online.
I began to express my dissatisfaction in my foul language, [said] that we had become fascists. Then I shouted at him. He left. I exhaled and... 10 minutes later I went in to apologize to him, wrote an application for a day's leave and left.
I went to a good friend's house and had tea with him. And then! It was awful... He started to prove to me that we were right to hit Ukraine. Okay, all these jerks, but he, the bastard, is justifying everything, putting up some videos. He was chief ideologist in the Soviet times. It's disgusting. I don't want to know him...
I went to see another comrade, and he said, "Why did Zelensky say he was going to make a nuclear bomb?
By count it turned out that 14 were for and 14 were against the war. That's in five days.
But then something happened that everyone started to meet only for the war. Where are we going?
Today, January 30, 2023, without announcing a reason, the children at the school were assembled, hoisted the flag, and informed of the creation of the "Movement of the First. They didn't say anything beforehand, just that they should come in dress uniform.
So, "the people who shot our fathers are making plans for our children. See every school in the Russian Frimperation.